Treatment Suggestions for the Abandonment Schema

Treatment Suggestions for the Abandonment Schema

1. Challenge any exaggerated view you have that other people will eventually leave you, die or behave unpredictably.

2. Watch how you respond to the temporary separation from others. Attempt to stay calm and not catastrophize the event.

3. Decease the unrealistic expectation that others should be endlessly available to you and totally consistent with you.

4. Learn to accept that other people have the right to set limits and establish separate space.

5. Watch for and reduce any behaviors you use to make sure other people in your life remain by you.

6. Challenge and decrease the view that you must do what other people want you to do so they do not leave you.

7. Actively choose partners who can make a commitment to you and become more comfortable in stable relationships.

8. End pushing partners away with jealous, clinging, angry or controlling behaviors.

9. Walk away from unstable relationships quickly and learn to tolerate being alone.

10. List times that you have experienced abandonment in your life, especially I childhood. Use EMDR to eliminate the negative emotions and self-perceptions created by those events.

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